Firewood: Men are Obsessed...at least I am

I love firewood and I think a lot of men love firewood too. What is it about the collection of wood for a guy? Many women have asked this question, along with many others and we men don't know the answer. I have yet to have the honor of owning a house with a fireplace or wood burner. Our next home (we move in August 30th!!) has neither, but I plan build a nice outdoor fire pit just to collect wood and burn it and then collect again only to burn it.

If you come across a man that has firewood you will notice two particular traits. First, the stack of wood is perfectly organized. All logs will be neatly stacked. Good luck getting a guy to dust the inside of the house, but if you asked him to split wood for 4 hours and then stack the wood in a neat pile, then you have a laborer. Second, the stack of wood will be large enough to survive 47 North Dakota winters. The stack could possibly get down to 32 winters, but more than likely the man will find more wood.

Regardless of your sex, we all enjoy a nice fire. Whether it is along the shore of a lake, deep in the back-country or in the comforts of our homes, the snap, crack and smell of a fire can't be beat. So raise your drink of choice, and salute to fire!!

God Bless and thanks for reading.

I have kids to feed!!!

I thought about adding this story with my previous blog post (click here), but your time is valuable and if you are like me, you read blogs in the car. Oh come on, the ad campaign is "don't text and drive" not "don't read a blog and drive." The below story actually took place the same time I was at the West Acres Mall with Emmett and Katelynn earlier this week. I hope you enjoy:

After my run in with Deputy Dewy (if you don't know who Deputy Dewy is, then you need to click the above link) I took the kids to the large funnel coin spinning thing. Emmett loves to watch pennies, nickels and dimes make the long journey down daddy's dreadful mall attraction. Katelynn enjoys this feature as well. Her challenge is to hit the coins just as they come off the ramp and force them to instantly slide down...Emmett strongly disagrees with her enjoyment. Post funnel coin thing, we went to the pet store, tortured fishys in a large fish tank and continuously pulled Katelynn from trying to walk into Spencer's Gifts.

After we hit our attractions, it's time for free samples. I would like to consider myself a sampler expert. I have considered bringing multiple outfits, but with two kids, samples are easy and plentiful to come by. The key with the sampler is to convince them you have no idea they are providing samples. I like to stroll by pretending to struggle with my kids. The sampler sees dad in distress and has no choice but to assist with extra samples.

On Monday we had a different experience. This particular sample was a grab and go. There was not an employee handing out the sample and all mall customers were on the honor system. Except for Dorthy. I am not sure her name was Dorthy, but as I approached the sample spot, Dorthy arrived the same time. I was riding a wave of momentum. Deputy Dewy and I just went toe to toe and now I had another match. Dorthy arrived and started to go to town on the samples. She was ambidextrous!! She had a good technique and would squash a Super Bowl party. After she cleaned 1/4 of the plate I felt compelled to say something. "Sorry mam, but I have kids to feed. Are you almost done?" Dorthy abruptly turned and looked at me and gave me the look of a mother bear protecting her cub. She didn't speak but her actions told me she wanted one last dive and she would be done. Dorthy took her last dive and managed to drop her last piece into the marinara sauce. She took one last look at me, another look at the staff behind the counter and went for it. You guessed it!! She put her finger licked fingers in the sauce, pulled out the bite and savored the moment. At this point I was happy for Dorthy and I think Dorthy was happy too. She was on cloud nine.

It was a funny moment and one I will never forget. I wish I had a moral of the story moment, but this is just good old entertainment folks.

God Bless and thanks for reading.

Tyler Tracy vs. Mall Security

I just started reading an excellent book titled: The Me I want to Be: Becoming God's Best Version of You. Click the title for the Amazon link. The book is by John Ortberg. I am always looking for a good read and happen to come across this book accidentally. My family and I are staying at Amanda's parents house over the summer and Amanda's dad had this book laying out. I read the first chapter and I am hooked. Lately I have been struggling with personal identity. I think we all do. I found I was getting frustrated with my characteristics/personality/habits...again, I think we all do, but after reading the first chapter, this is the only chapter I have read so far, John Ortberg paints a very clear picture: You are who you are because God made you how He wants you to be. Those are in my own words. Mr. Ortberg managed to put it 24 different ways over 12 pages, but I got the point. So this leads me to my story and thus the title of the blog: Tyler Tracy vs. Mall Security.

I took Emmett and Katelynn to the West Acres Mall Monday morning. It was a great day to be outside, but sometimes it feels good to change the environment. The kids and I go the mall weekly and our routine rarely changes. First thing first, daddy has to grab a coffee from McDonald's. After McDs we travel over to the new and improved kid's play-land. Emmett and Katelynn love the new kid's zone. Compared to the last one, you don't hear a liquidy squishy noise as you walk on the carpet or check your child's diaper frequently because you believe she may have gone to the bathroom only to realize it's the smell of the room you are in. We enter the room and the kids go crazy. They run off to play. I find a spot for the stroller and then head out to find the kids. Unlike the other parents in the room, I am actually playing with my kids instead of spending time on my phone...sorry, slight jab at modern day parenting. Five minutes go by and Deputy Dewy enters the room. He instantly notices I have a coffee inside the precious new and improved kid's playland. Here's how the conversation went:

Dewy: "Sir, is this your stroller."
Me: "Yes it is."
Dewy: " Sir, we have a no beverages policy in this room. Only water bottles are allowed."
Me: "Oh, well we just got here and I was planning to play with my kids. I won't touch it until we leave the room."
Dewy: "No sir, you can't have the beverage in the room at all. Only water bottles."
Me: "I understand where you are coming from. I am asking you to make an exception considering I won't touch the drink until we leave. Currently the coffee is in a cup holder and won't go any where."
Dewy: "Sorry sir, no exceptions. Only water bottles."

At this point, I was thinking if he said water bottle one more time...

Me: "What happens if the water bottle spills on the floor? Isn't that bad too?"
Dewy: "Water bottles have a cap."
Me: "Not when you are drinking it."
Dewy: "Sir, are you going to remove the drink?"
Me: "I think I have a chance yet, so no."
Dewy: "Sir, if you don't remove the drink then I will have to ask you to leave."
Me: "Do you understand that this policy is not correct? I understand where you are coming from and realize you are doing your job, but don't you think there should be an exception?"
Dewy: "No sir."

At this point, Katelynn came crying over and we left. My brother in law (Brian Stroh) did a blog about policies and how they sometimes just don't make sense. Click here for more details.

I walked away with two thoughts:

1. Just because its a policy doesn't mean its correct. My drink was harmless and was not going to cause any trouble. Just walk away Dewy.

2. We are who we are. God has designed us to be specific human beings. I have tired relentlessly to counteract certain personality traits I carry and it's hard. It doesn't make it okay if they are used in a negative way and I probably should have backed off, but I couldn't resist. I wanted to debate with Dewy. I had to win.

God has bless me with a personality and characteristics only specific to me. I am very thankful for who I am. It is up to me to make sure I don't disappoint God with my actions.

God Bless and thanks for reading.

The Ultimate Sun Tan Lotion

I love how God makes my mind think. I am trying to stay as humble as possible, but God has blessed me with a gift of "out of the box" thinking and I love it. There are only about 2 people that truly appreciate my ideas. We have some awesome conversations. Most of my ideas fail to complete the full clock rotation. What I mean is an idea needs to start at noon and make it all the way around to midnight. If this can be accomplished, then the idea is a good idea and worth pursuing. My ideas stop around 3:17pm because there are about 25 "what ifs"  that don't justify the idea.

This is idea probably falls around 2:34pm:

What if swimming pools had a built in sun tan lotion? Let's say you take the family to the local pool and can't wait to wear the kids down. If your family is anything like mine, from the time we leave the house to the time the kids actually get in the pool, 30 minutes have gone by. Of that 30 minutes, 15 is spent putting on sun tan lotion. Parent tip: strap kids in car seat and then apply sun tan lotion...mid evil and cruel, but it works. Anyway, imagine not having to put on sun tan lotion? Just tell the kids to jump in!! Pools with a chemical design to block the sun's rays would be brilliant. Let's take this a step further. You can also buy the product and add it to your own small pool. Ah man, cash in the kid's college, sell the cars and say good by to Amanda's retirement, this is a gold mine.

I am sure many of you (I am not sure how many actually read my blogs and thank you to those who do) have many points to make as to why this is not a good idea. I would agree with all of them. If anything can be taken from this blog, is to think outside of the box!! Don't be afraid to talk about something so pointless and ridiculous. Make someone laugh and who knows, you might have a million dollar idea someday.

God bless and thanks for reading.

Blog Reference...please read

I've provided a link to my brother-in-laws recent blog posts. I love it and hope you do too. As people of the church, we tend to be too critical. This blog encourages all Christians to open their arms and graciously serve all people.

http://viewofthehill.blogspot.com/2013/06/healthy-church-shopping.html?showComment=1370442182579#c5098160542486000387

Facebook "Likes"

I used to be a strong opponent of Facebook. I thought it was an intrusion of privacy and a large social psychiatrist chair. I still believe this to be true, but Facebook has also taken on an additional identity. First, I have control over whom and what I see, but more importantly, they have allowed organizations, institutions, companies, non profits, artists, magazines, books, authors, sport teams, athletes, and many others, to promote their cause and/or news. It's great to see how others are doing. Facebook has opened the door for conversations when I meet the individual later. But Facebook is even better to keep up with an organization and etc. No longer do I have to search or keep tabs on an artist and when will they come out with their next album. They tell me via Facebook. No longer do I have to look for a good TED talk. They tell me via Facebook. Although Facebook has its negatives, Facebook is a great avenue for information.

I am always looking for additional "Likes." What are your top 5 "Likes?" I enjoy the following:

1. TED talks
2. In Touch Daily Devotional
3. Bleacher Report
4. Honest Trailers
5. Dave Ramsey

God bless and thanks for reading.

Chunky vs. Creamy?

Are you a chunky or creamy? I grew up both. Our family always had a chunky peanut butter and creamy butter container available. I enjoy chunky, but didn't like the peanuts getting stuck in my teeth. Creamy is great, but feels too simple. Since I got married, creamy has been...well...cream of the crop in our house. Amanda prefers the creamy option and I am too cheap to buy two containers...until one day I had an idea. What if there could be both a creamy and chunky container? Go with me and I will show you where I am taking this. Imagine a container with two lids. A lid on top and a lid on the bottom. At the middle of the container would be a barrier separating the chunky from the creamy. The two would never mix and here is the kicker. Because peanut butter doesn't move when tipped upside down, both the creamy and the chunky would hold their position, thus you would avoid a large chunk of peanut butter stuck to the lid. Imagine the savings!! I understand this would be difficult for the family that has 2 chunkys and 3 creamys. Eventually the creamys would be waiting for the chunkys to finish their half. But talk about a socialistic grocery option. Equal and everyone wins!! Probably too crazy since the big peanut butter companies have not come out with the idea yet, but one can dream.



In addition, how come Drew Brees, Quarterback for the New Orleans Saints, is not the official spokes person for Fabreeze? They are missing out.

God bless and thanks for reading.